It's Christmas

So here in Texas, the wind blows harder and a bit colder. The air feels warmer before the gusts start. Yesterday was a balming 75 degrees. And today, it has dropped to 30-something degrees. Snow flurries are in the air. Our girls prayed for snow today...and it is coming down.

We've had a lot of "Heavenly Father is watching over us" experiences over the past few weeks...few months that I see now. I wonder why I was so slow to see His hand before. Perhaps being in a "dependent" place causes me to see His hand because I need Him.

Will is still without work...well...without work that provides income. He still applies for employment just about everyday. Our financial situation...from my perspective - which really is so narrow because Heavenly Father can see so much more than I can...looks bleak. And, yet I know, because I have felt so, that Heavenly Father is aware, mindful of our needs and situation.

So experiences 1 & 2:

1. On Tuesday, I used money we got back from a reimbursement check to take the girls to Christmas Shopping at Dollar Tree. Will and I had received an email earlier from our landlady inquiring if we were renewing our contract, and if so, we needed proof of income.

There is no income.

I was feeling very troubled about the current situation which is - we are here, states away from parents and siblings and "easy help". We are in a place where truly, our dependence on the Lord feels paramount. The Church has been helping us with food...and friendship...and callings. I would be lost without the Church. I would be lost without knowing that God speaks to us today.

Anyway, I was in the car with the children, despairing our situation. I bowed by head and offers a silent prayer to Heavenly Father asking for peace, for reassurance....My cell rang. It was Sis. Ballard. She had "something" to drop off for our family...not from her, but from another family who wanted to give us something for Christmas. I imagined packages for the children :). After bing in the store a few minutes, I called Will to let Him know about Sis. Ballard coming over.
Our conversation went something like this.

M- Hello?

W- Hello.

M- Hi Dear. I wanted to let you know that Sis. Ballard is on her way over to drop something off for the family.

W- Oh. She already came. And she brought a jar of money.

M- (GASP) Are you serious?

W- Yes. I think there's about $100.00 in here.

M- Oh, my goodness (and at this point, I started sobbing in the store).

W- I know. I can't believe it....

Anyway, I was overcome in that moment to know that the Lord is mindful of our needs and wants and situation.

Later that night, we had a secret Santa leave us gifts on the walk in front of our home.

And then even later, the peace came.

2. I woke at midnight. Anxious, unable to sleep. So, I did what I felt to. I opened my Book of Mormon.

I LOVE the Book of Mormon. It has brought me closer to Christ. It has whispered peace in the night. It has lifted my thoughts to Heavenly places.

So, on this night, I read and read and read...for 2 hours...uninterrupted. I read about Aaron and the conversion of the Lamanite King to when Alma, Ammon, Aaron, Omner, Amulek, Zeezrom, Shiblon and Corianton went to preach repentance to the Zoramites.

And after reading, peace came. I felt Heavenly Fathers kindness. His teaching me.

Heavenly Father wants me to be humble. To be maleable. To be submissive.

And I can choose to be so or not so.

And I choose now to be so. I make so many mistakes. But this is why Jesus is. Because we need Him...I need Him to help me back. In my quite times of praying, I feel His love so gently wrapping me, enfolding me. My eyes cannot stay dry...the tears, they just come. He is the miracle of Christmas.

I remembered that we are here in Texas because God wants us here and He will provide a way. His way.