Thankful Thursday and French Cut String Beans

 When DH and I married, we decided not to postpone starting our family.  So we were not completely surprised when as newly weds we were expecting our first child.

What we didn't expect was nine months of morning sickness accompanying our scholastic poverty.

One morning we were discussing our plight...both of us jobless, with him in school and living in Hawaii. I had been having what seemed like severe cravings. I wanted a milkshake or fruit. Something fresh, or cold. That something did NOT include canned french cut string beans, which was what we had in our cupboard.

So, laying in bed, hoping for a reprieve from the nausea and vomiting, I tried convincing DH to go for a walk to the nearest Star Market or Jack-in-the-Box and buy me something my stomach would enjoy. Like a piece of fresh fruit or a milkshake.


DH is very practical. We had both been seeking for jobs for a couple of months but were still without work. And looking at the budget...of something like $11.00...and knowing that was all we had, he said very practically, "Honey, I'm sorry. We don't have any money for that. But, there is a can of string beans I can open for you."


With those words, I was convinced DH didn't love me. He did not understand my need to satisfy this craving. He didn't know that I could not stomach another can of string beans. But maybe he did. And maybe he knew that was the best he could give then.


And so, he walked to the shelf, picked up, yes, the last can of beans...which was the last can of anything on our shelves, opened it and handed it to me with a fork.


I slowly ate over half the can, all the while complaining in my mind about the lack of empathy he had over our situation. I thought nothing about this being the last can of anything. I thought nothing about my DH who had nothing for breakfast...and now nothing at all.


Needless to say, the beans stayed down for the most of five minutes. And then I cried. Cried over impatience with this situation. Cried over DH and lack of empathy. Cried over missing family. Just cried. 

Did Heavenly Father remember us in Hawaii? If so, I was convinced He would help. But where was the help?

Shortly after eating and spewing the beans, and feeling really left alone, the mail came. 

Enclosed was an unexpected check from a loved one whom I had loaned money to years previous. The money was enough to cover rent, utilities, expenses, groceries, and yes even a milkshake. 

Time and other pregnancies have helped temper me during these craving moments. To realize the world will not end if I cannot satisfy that craving instantly. 

It has been just recently that DH has explained his side of the story and that I have understood his love in giving me that last can of beans. My selfishness blinded my ability to see this.

Tonight, DH and I went to the temple and reminisced about this experience. I have tender feelings about it now. Tender feelings toward DH. Tender feelings toward God. 

So, tonight for Thankful Thursday, I am thankful for the can of beans.